Sometimes the hardest person to set a boundary with… is yourself.

Especially if you’re used to being the flexible one. The easygoing one. The one who can roll with it. Most of us don’t override our boundaries on purpose. We do it quietly. Automatically. Because it feels safer, more familiar, or just easier than risking tension.

A lot of people think boundaries are what you say to other people. But in many ways it’s actually what you believe about yourself. Because it’s really hard to hold a boundary if you’re not sure you’re allowed to or deserve to have one in the first place.

Hearing a boundary from your partner can feel… uncomfortable.

Even if they say it kindly. Even if you know it’s not an attack. Even if you want to be supportive. It’s still easy to feel like you’ve done something wrong… or like they’re pulling away.

But boundaries aren’t a rejection. They’re actually an attempt to stay connected in a way that feels safe, respectful, and real.